I should have died yesterday.
Let me tell you about my day, the day of July 1st, 2013. It was a semi-busy one, I had to run to the BMV to get a license plate for my car, and then later I was going to dinner with my grandma and best friend to celebrate her graduation. I ran out to New Haven to get my little '96 SL 2 a plate, but of course it was a Monday and they were closed. So I ran home to do some chores before going to my butty's house. If you don't know my butty is Brandy Lee and she is a wondrous soul whom I love muchly!
I was driving on the road i always take into New Haven, but it was raining pretty hard. I took a small curve and somehow ended up swerving into the wrong lane. I saw a car coming and i knew I couldn't hit them, I just couldn't. I tried to get back in my lane, but the swerving just got worse. I tried to turn right and brake at the same time (smart move Brittnay, smart move..) and it caused me to spin off the road and smash directly on my drivers side door into a lovely tree. I sat in shock for a few seconds, but when i saw two men approaching my car quickly, I began crying and screaming for them to get me out of the car. My brain finally kicked into gear and I tried to assess my body.
I moved my left leg around, a little sore, and ya know, my drivers side had crunched in 2 feet on it. I expected bones to be protruding. I didn't feel dizzy or anything, but my car was making a weird noise. I attempted to turn it off but the key was stuck inside the ignition. One man was on my drivers side talking calmly to me (Yeah, because I was really listening in all my hysterics), and the other had come around and was trying to open my passengers door. He yelled at me to unlock it, so I crawled to my passenger seat and did so, he flung it open, and asked if i was okay. Through the snot and tears I was able to get out a yes, and I began to gather my stuff that had been strewn across the car. My phone had flew all the way to my back window above my seats, and my contact solution I'd just bought was nowhere to be found. I was crying and grabbing my purse and overnight bag when a woman came up and said I could sit in her car. They asked me if i wanted an EMS and i outright refused.
With shaking fingers I called my dad and then Brandy. Soon after that an EMT came over and told me i might have hidden injuries and i needed to go to the hospital. I was sitting in the EMS when my dad showed up. I broke down crying all over again and he just looked at me and said "You're going." There is no arguing with my father. They strapped me down like a mental health patient and started me on an IV. It was all a bit excessive in my opinion.
When we got to the hospital, they started to do a million things, including cutting off one of the only nice outfits i have! >:( Oh well... My safety is what was important right? The least they could have done was bought me new corduroys...
They x-rayed me and made me sit in my stupid hospital bed still covered in glass for close to two hours, but they finally told me I was okay and discharged me. My dad,, grandma, and Brandy and her mom sat with me as i complained about my lack of clothing and the fact that I was starving. Once the doctor came and had me sign my discharge papers, my dad dropped me at home. I showered and just sat down to ice my injuries and calm my still racing heart.
As i was swerving, and the second before I hit the tree, all I could think was "Oh my Gods, i'm going to die, i'm going to die and i'm not going to know what to do and it won't matter because I'll be DEAD."
I think it took until about nine o' clock for it to hit me that i was supposed to be six feet under. I lay face down on the floor for awhile, walked aimlessly around my apartment and cried a little bit. Then I ate about a half pound of applesauce and hugged my cat to death... Seems effective right? When it's all said and done, I shouldn't be sitting here. My EMT Isha told me that when they get to crashes like that, they're pronouncing people dead on the scene. I should not have been able to walk away from that. But what my dad and grandma were unable to accept was that I had a divine protector looking out for me. God saved my life, and that must mean I'm not done working on this Earth! I guess I'm still trying to comprehend what great thing is to come, what am i to be a part of that is so important i can't afford to die? I suppose I'll find out, huh?
God not only saves, He provides. That morning, when i woke up, I was going over my finances and I realized i was doomed. The job I had with a woman through the church was only getting me 12 hours a week. Barely enough to pay rent. I texted my mentor Barbie Ballschmidt and asked her to pray that if God thought I needed another job to be financially stable he would provide one for me. I had been home maybe 2 hours from the hospital when i received a call from an unknown number. It was a woman from Pier 1 where I'd had an interview earlier this year. She outrightly offered me a job, and I start Saturday!!! GOD IS GOOD! Don't you ever dare to tell me He isn't!
I will never be able to refute the fact that I am saved in body and soul. Perhaps He was giving me a reminder, perhaps He made me to share this story and spark someones curiosity in His greatness. I survived for a reason, and one day I'll ask him why. Although I can't say the same for my poor Sammy, he lasted me a good solid month! I guess all that's left to ask is... Anyone know someone selling a car?
Genesis 50:21
"So then, don't be afraid. I will provide for you and your children." And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them.
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